I love my To-Go Ware. This is no secret, especially to those who know me well. I use my set constantly, whipping it out of my handbag at every opportunity, whether it’s lunch at Whole Foods or in the car on road trips. I even gave sets to several of my family members this Christmas. I love my little bamboo set of utensils like a prize, and treat it accordingly. My dogs, however, are another story.
One of our dogs has what’s called “separation anxiety”. I like to call it, “What the hell did Sadie chew this time?” Every time we leave the house, we’re bound to return to find something chewed to smithereens. If I forget to close my closet door, Sadie will chew whichever pair of shoes I value the most at the time. Her favorite things to chew, though, are paper goods and cardboard. Ted and I used to make the mistake of leaving important mail in our mail basket, which we stopped doing after Sadie made short work of some DMV documents. She also chewed up our friend’s credit card once. Actually, it was his parents’ credit card, which is hardly consolation.
Sadie’s pattern of chewing things is well documented, so I always clear the floor and surfaces within her reach of things she finds irresistible. If I’m in a hurry or I forget to do this, I’ll return to discover that whatever was laying around has been utterly destroyed. Sadie never lets us down; she chews that offending item to death, because obviously it was plotting mutiny, and how could she just sit there and let it scheme against us?
So a couple of weeks ago I misplaced my set of To-Go Ware, which was a travesty in itself. I’d tasted the sweet joy of using a sustainably-produced bamboo fork, how could I possibly be reduced to using plastic? I actually took to carrying around a metal fork, which led to a couple of mishaps while groping around inside my purse for my sunglasses.
I searched far and wide, but there was no To-Go Ware to be found. I resolved to buy another set, but I wanted to hold out a little longer in case my well-loved set eventually turned up.
It did.
I came home one day after an absence of a few hours, and our entryway was strewn with little bamboo bits. They were on the floor, on the furniture, and even on our piano, which I still haven’t figured out. Sadie had even torn the fabric carrier to shreds. Hey, at least she was thorough.
She’s not all that innocent
To this day I still have no idea where the To-Go Ware set was. It probably fell out of my bag when I set it down by the front door, and then it got shuffled to an undetermined location where Sadie could enjoy it at a later date. Well, at least this will force me to finally replace my old set, because I can’t keep carrying around a metal fork. If I stab my hand with it one more time, I might just stop using utensils entirely.
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